A friend of mine suggested I start blogging- SO, here it goes.
2010 was an amazing year for me and my family. Paull (the hubbie) and I celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary but not before we found out that after 10 years respectivly, we were in the family way! I knew 2010 was gonna be our year when in 2009, at Christmas I made a vow to myself to stop at nothing in the coming year to get pregnant. Well, I'm be damned-IT WORKED.
The months ticked by as they always do, milestone after milstone we hit. Viablity-Check, Heartbeat-Check, Penis-CHECK ...etc. (We found out at 20+ weeks it was a boy!) We decided to name him Matthew James Leo, cause Skeletor Durbin didn't quite have a ring to it. (j/k) Matthew for gift from God, James after the hubbie and his dad and Leo after my dad.
20 weeks 3 days
So, as I said the year dragged on but finally on October 20 2010 after being in labor for over 24 hours Matthew was delivered via c-section and came in weighing 8lbs 12 oz and 21 inches long.
So now here we are in 2011 and my twelve weeks of maternity are up and I am not a happy girl. I get sick everytime I think about leaving him. We have a very nice babysitter but it still pisses me off that I didn't try harder thoughout the year to figure out a way to stay home with my precious cargo. SO, I sit here day after day-in turmoil loving the days I have left with my son but dreading them cause I know they are numbered and soon I will be returning to work. Sometimes, I am SUPER sad, other times PISSED. I feel like I am going thru the cycles of grief, only never gettting to the acceptance part. I am hoping this blog will help. Guess only time will tell.
Till next time..